Knowing you “can’t have children”.
Its hard to figure out if you do want them?
Did you once want them ?
Are you now unsure because you know you can't?
Do you still deep down hope you can?
You know there is more value to your life than simply having a child.
But you know there is so much joy and value to be had from parenting.
You know there are endless possibilities and freedoms in life if you don't have children.
But then you are aware that children can liberate you in ways others can't.
So you reassure yourself you are ok.
But then you wonder if you are?
Then you tell yourself you have to be ok.
And then you aren’t sure whether this feeling is that of acceptance or a conditioned protective response which leaves you slightly numb.
As I said …children… it's complicated.
Comments